Reflections… Have You Fulfilled Your Dreams?
The year is over… where did the time go? Do you feel as though the days slipped by like sand sifting through your fingers? And like most people, were you too caught up in the frenzied lifestyle that dominates our society today to stop and smell the proverbial roses? You know what I'm talking about. Demands and obligations that distract you from your dreams, goals and objectives. Go ahead, admit it, life has a way of getting in the way, robbing you of the time and desire to follow through. Or does it?
Every year we start off with great intentions. Promises of weight loss, exercise and getting healthy are fervently resolved, only to have them all disappear in the wake of life's demands. In fact 1 in 4 don't make it past the first week and 1 in 2 give up after a month. So let me ask you… If you saw a family member or friend struggling would you let them flounder? Or… would you encourage them to hang in there while providing the support they need to accomplish their goal? Then why would you give up so easily on yourself? Why is it so hard for you to stay the course? Could it be that you're just making excuses?
Procrastination is the method of choice for self sabotage. On some subconscious level, there is fear associated with getting what we want, a benefit from staying where we are or a combination of the two. Consider the person who wants to lose weight but feels protected by it. Many years ago, one of my clients, an obese professional was coming in for low back pain. When I brought up her weight, she immediately got defensive and left the office in a huff. Despite her displeasure, she continued her care, consistently warning me to avoid discussing her weight and claiming it didn't bother her. Eventually, she agreed to allow me to assess the presence of an emotional connection to her health. I started working with her and ultimately discovered that a relationship at 19 had resulted in a very traumatic breakup. This client shielded herself from re-experiencing that kind of pain by remaining overweight and undesirable. In her case she both feared being slender and benefited from staying obese in an attempt to avoid heartache. Once that emotional charge was gone, she set a goal, lost the unhealthy weight and eventually moved into a new and healthy relationship. Know someone like that?
Our choices in life are rooted in patterns of coping established from childhood through early adulthood. This mechanism, based in survival, is in place regardless of whether we've had a happy or unhappy life, the difference is in the outcome. How we interpret the world around us leads to either a positive or negative result because events in and of themselves have no emotion other than the emotion we give them. According to Candace Pert in her book “Molecules of Emotion" every time we have an emotional response to something, we activate a cascade of chemicals, called neuropeptides, that elicit a cellular response. This gives new meaning to the phrase “It's all in your head" and validates the mind body connection. As I always tell patients if it's in your head, it's in your body and if it's in your body, it's in your head.
So before you berate yourself for not following through, stop and reflect on your choices. Try and determine why you might want to hang on to those extra pounds, neglect your appearance, endure migraines, pain, discomfort or even illness. What are you hiding from and how are you benefiting from perpetuating the condition or problem. Seek ways, such as NET to help you transform your thoughts and eliminate the excuses. Resolving to change that part of yourself that is sabotaging your efforts will improve your life. Keep in mind, awareness is the first step to change. Stay Healthy!
Posted In: Health Buzz Blog